Lack of Intellingence

So over the course of the weekend I encountered my fair share of ignorance. Maybe more then my fair share...  First a chick from OK who has a severe plastic addiction told me I didn't know my own birthday and then told me I wasn't smart... Funny thing is when I messaged her back and said thanks for the convo, and to try the veal I would be here all week, she asked me what a convo was and what a veal was. Who the brainiac now? Here's your ID-10-T sign.

So then my son is photographed hanging out his bedroom window and its posted to FB, at the time I was not home, and I did see the photo and was on my way home to have a meeting. Well my neghbor took that opportunity to play spy and get the same photo.  Then she jumps me as I am getting out of my car, saying that her son is butt hurt because he over heard me telling my son that I don't trust her kid. Last time I checked, we still live in the USA and I was using my 1st Amendment Right.  
And then trys to tell me my kid is no saint... Tell me something I don't know. So when I told her that not only do I not trust her son but 98% of all kids in the neighborhood over 12, she told me to watch it or else.

OR ELSE?!?  Or else what? Are we fucking 15, are you going to kick my ass? Please try something cause I may be no saint but I guarantee that my word will be a hell of a lot better then yours.

So then the kid starts txting my kid about how we are talking shit. How does me telling my son that I don't trust another kid and to stay away from him constitute me talking shit?
One better the mom gets on the kids phone and txts him of course leaving the boys tag "talk shit get hit"
This has now become a threat from a 50 yr old lady to a 14 yr old kid.

But wait theres more....

So now my kid is out back and the other boy is talking shit to him as he cleans up the back yard "Yeah pussy just wait, keep talking shit you faggot" right in front of his mom... does she do anything? No.... and then.... the wonderful young man that I have trust issues with posts on FB a threat to see if my son is man enough.

So I call and talk to a cop on duty and his reply was don't say stuff like that in front of kids.  You have got to be kidding me!

So the morning arrives and as soon as the boy gets to school, this fantastic contributor to society tells my kid "you just wait till we get home"

And all this time my kid has been ignoring him. When is enough enough? I can't wait to move out of this town.

And as always try the veal, I am here all week!

Facelift

Sleep eludes me tonight/ this morning, and I have to be to work in 2 hours. Oh life is grand.
I decided that I needed to come in and actually give my page a facelift. Especially seeing as I have made a promise to myself to get over here and blog.

For those of you that haven't met me yet whoo hoo How you doin?
This is me back in the day...

and me now....

Me and my Spawn

A face to a name/blog is always nice don't you think?


Now on to the main event, this morning's tale is one like no other... my brain has been waging a battle for the last few days on whether or not to send the Douche Waffle a letter with some updated photos. Not that it will get him off his lazy ass and actually start living up to his obligations as a father, but more as me being the better person. Part of me says don't do it, he's not making an effort so its his loss. Part of me says yeah do it, but cut off all the heads in the pictures. And the last part says to just be nice and update him. What would you do?
I am seriously leaning towards option 2.

I look at these boys and have watched them grow up over the last 4yrs with only having me as their real influence... Of course Grandma and Grandpa and their Uncle help to, but I am the one that they actually rely on 99.9% of the time. They truely amaze me.

This kid is gonna go places. He self taught himself guitar, he can do anything he puts his mind to, and the girls are all over him. Oh and as a Freshman he has decided that he wants to play football, and be a cheer leader or Spirit helper... Good on ya buddy!!! He's like yeah all their boyfriends are gonna hate me because I get to cop a feel.
Soon he will be the Senior Deacon for his chapter of Demolay. I can't express how much I love this institution!!
He is wise beyond his years and one day might actually out prank his mother.

Dewey here is my evil genius. He's one cool spawnlett. Whether its playing ball or looking for ways to con me in to a chemistry set (isn't gonna happen cause it will be the one day they decide to update Google Earth and you will be able to find my house but the mushroom cloud where the house once stood). Constantly trying to keep up with Spawn 1...and he can't wait to become a Demolay.

Last but certainly can hold his own is Schmuckel. I have a variety of nicknames for this boy. He cracks me up. He and Dewey were fighting so much the last week of school that the school called and said he was in the principals office because of it. First question I asked... "Did they spill blood on the Carpet?"
Needless to say he did get his bike taken away for the weekend and had to suffer moms horrible off key singing.

I don't know what I did to deserve these crumb snatchers but I love 'em to death and wouldn't trade them for anything.... or would I? Nah just kidding.

All in all not sure what I should do about their Donor...maybe I should do an internet poll. Who knows...

A few things are certain for now... I have to go to work in an hour and did not get any sleep, and I can't wait to go see Hells Belles on Sunday. Its the boys first concert... whoo hoo can't wait.
So until later....
~me

Where the hell have I been

I realized tonight that I haven't blogged in forever. So sit back and enjoy my ramblings.
I am not sure why I stopped posting blogs... Oh wait yes I do...It was because I was tired of just writing about the extreme mood swings I was having. One co-payment later the doc started me on lithium and welbutron. You guessed it! Bipolar... What a shock after the pills finally worked on the gray matter between my ears! I felt better and wasn't flying off the handle. The kids no longer tiptoed about.
For the past two years it's been an adventure that's for sure. Bubba discovered girls and kissing, and girls discovered him back. He sang a song at the school talent show and the girls reacted as if it were the Beatles playing Ed Sullivan.
Wheezer is just starting to see what girls are about, but still would rather be on the ball field or reading Percy Jackson or Harry Potter. Yay! He is my Einstein. He wants a chemistry set but all I can see is a mushroom cloud on google maps where our house used to be. I know you can say whatever but trust me when I say the Murphy is my best friend and worst enemy!
And then there is Chief or Booger depends on his moods. He is a funny kid constantly cracking me up with his isms. My favorite to date was when the news came on and told the world that Bin Liden had met his maker. Chief looked right at myom and I and said "why is it always the mexicans?" he cracks me up!!!
The last two years have been fun as well. It took two trips to Great Wolf Lodge... Spent time with friends in a city out of the fish bowl I live in. I think mentally I am starting to scab over and heal, but I don't know when I will be throwing myself at mercy of Venus, eventually I willl get there. But until then I must bid you fRewell... Two more days!!! Lucky for ms it counts for OT! Yay

Good night!

just little somethin

I was browsing Youtube the other day and was watching some of the videos and video blogs that were posted. Some were good and others irritated the shit out of me. There was one that really got me. I am not posting a link to protect the guilty. Anyways, I am sitting there watching it, I almost threw my drink at it and then realized it was my laptop I was watching it on.

I know, you are saying get to the point what was so horrible about it. WWEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLL (takes a deep breath..), being a videographer, one upon a lifetime ago, I have to say #1) CUE CARDS- This keeps you from saying ummm, and, oh, and making that stupid clicking noise with your tongue. #2) There is no need for the bug eyes... it scares people, makes them not want to pay attention to what you are saying, and they focus on the fact that your eyes are bugging out like you are taking the shit of all shits. So soften your eyes. #3) Relax... you don't have to get the video perfect in one shot, do multiple takes and then choose from the best one.

and #4) Write down all your ideas and put them on the cue cards that way you can touch basis on them without trying to remember, yes this goes hand in hand with #1.

I know it doesn't take a genius to use a video camera and post to Youtube but one would think if this is what you want to represent your company you would make it best representation you can.

There were some cute ones too, the one that really comes to mind was the babies laughing... It always tickles me to hear little baby giggles. Makes me crack up.

Anywho... my friends I have to go, I have to get up at the ass-crack of dawn to take the teen spawn to the temple so he can go hang with his Demolay buddies for 4 days at Great Wolf. I will be there on Saturday, and me and the 2 junior spawn will slide, slide, slide until we are prune-y and ready to crash. WHOOO hoo I can't wait.

Good night all

Kris

A tale of the holidays

Twas the day of the Christmas party and I was rushing like mad, I still had to get alcohol, EGADS!
Armed with some rum and a really cute guy, we sped to Seattle as the trees flew by.
We got to the ferry and I took a spill, "Beer me" I said, its better then Pills.
Checked in the coats and grabbed our chips, off to play poker and took one in the hip.
Saw everyone I chat with in the Jabber IM, I exist, yes really I do, just like the red M & M.
Took photos galore and ate some great food, I won a lava lamp, it lightened the mood.
We headed for home as it grew later that night, finally we saw PA was in sight.
To the house we headed, **wink, wink** yes its true...
Fell asleep on the couch before we took off our shoes.

Ok I know its cheesy... but it was fun to do.
The Christmas Party was a blast, great food, great friends, good times.
It started snowing when I picked up the kids, this morning. We ended up trying to shovel all the snow in the complex over to our "yard" so we could build a fort.
We went over to a friends house and made some monkey bread... it was so good... and it disappeared FAST. Got the Christmas gifts wrapped and made some steak for dinner.
This was a fun, fun weekend and I'm sad to see it go.
Cookie making tomorrow, call the Fire Dept cause Kris is baking. ( I have been known to light myself of fire when pulling cookies from the oven)
I am outta here for the night. Take care and Happy Holidays!

Something about September

Nothing say Fall is back better then, "MMMMOOOOOOOOMMMMM wheres my homework?" or "I missed the bus" or my favorite... "BBBUUUTTTT IIIII DDDDOOONNNN'TTT WAANNNAAA GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO TTTOOOOOO BBBBBEEEDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Well the Spawn are in bed and its 10pm and this mom has put on her favorite PJ's, grabbed a cold beverage and is winding down. Whoo what a day... then again what a month!
Finally got the big desktop reformatted... and he feels so much better!. Runs like a champ! The kids are doing great, School is coming along nicely. Jack is loving school. They are learning Humpty Dumpty. Nate is playing the violin this year and AJ, well the goofball has made it to the 7th grade with minimal scarring. He is still in the band (doomed to be there til he graduates) and is thriving on his guitar.
Back to school night was fun for both of the boys, (Jacks is soon). AJ is already trying to think of pranks he can pull... We'll see how far he gets... Then mom will show him how to do it without getting caught.LOL

We all did get a case of the sickies... Over Labor Day weekend no less, as much as it sucked, we medicated, slept and repeated. We feel so much better. Last weekend Jack and I went on a Hike with some friends of ours and had a blast. Felt like we ran the trail but it was good and the muscles said thank you.

October is right around the corner and as usual this house can't wait. Halloween falls on a Sat and the boys are excited. Jack is going as a giraffe, Nate is still undecided, AJ is contemplating, and me... well this year I am thinking I have a few ideas up my sleeve but its going to be a secret.

I hear a good book calling my name and sometimes that can be just as bad as the Reese's in the fridge murmuring to me in the middle of the night and then in the morning waking up with all the wrappers around my bed... but then again I can't wait til this weekend when I can go get my copy of The Lost Symbol... YEA!!! I am also thinking if it is sucky outside I am going to go give my library card a workout. Here I go again off track, do they have a bloggers form of ADD? Writing about one thing and then all of a sudden off to the races on another subject...
Call me the classic Gemini but I have been known to have several conversations with the same person at once.. Thats 3 different subjects all at the same time(if only it weren't fat finger wednesday). And lets not forget... "oh look.... a woody" Hey wait... thats me.
I swear I am not on anything... this is me after a day at work... the more stress, the lower my blood pressure...
Ok peoples, I am going to my bed... for real... I promise.
No, really here I go.

~Kristi

A day at the fair...

"Look mom the fair is here!! Can we go?? PLLLEEEAAASSEE???"
"We won't fight again, EVER. We Promise"
"Can we please go"

So I bought tickets for the rides, and took half the day off so my kids could "do the Fair"
Spawn #1 immediately asked for his ride ticket and said "SEE YA"
The other two spawn and I went to look at the animals and see what freebies we could get.
We ran into a friend of mine and walked around all the animals and booths and got a small show from the magician. The kids still can't figure out how he, and the moms were able to bend the half dollar. After eating one of the over priced sandwiches (I really should have got the Gyro), the spawn and I bid farewell to our friends and went to the carnival.
Spawn #3 decided this was the year he went on all the big boy rides... Height permitting of course. I normally am not all that thrilled to go to this fair, but this year was different. My boys and I had a ball. They squished me on the Scrambler... I mean the Sizzler. I spun them around until they were super dizzy in the Berry go round and they had a blast running into each other on the bumper cars.
We played some games and won some prizes. Nothing beats the look on their faces as we were leaving, priceless. Its time like this when being a mom is awesome.
The night ended with showers, hugs, and bed.